One of the better books I've read. It's the story of a ring which belongs to a really grouchy dude called "sour one". Now this ring is something he's forged in the fires of hell (no not his in-laws furnace, it really was the fires of hell). So this ring has this shitload of evil power and makes him a really powerful fella who kills people by the dozens. But somehow he manages to lose his ring and dies of shock (twas sentimental to him I guess, and I'm sure he hadn't insured it either), but he's the villain so he had to be resurrected, which the author does dutifully. So when "sour one" comes back he's really pissed, coz now he realises he's not only missing his ring, but also the finger it was on. Now this was a major pain to him, coz not only could he not beat people as he wasn't powerful without the ring, but he also couldn't show more powerful people the finger, coz he didn't have the finger either (how's that for a real bad day).

Now this ring somehow manages to reach a dude called Gollum, who looks like someone a japanese cook tried to make sushi out of but quit midway (yep he's messed up alright). This gollum fella then hides in a cave and eats fish all day coz he now doesn't like fish all that much (who would if someone tried to make sushi out of ya??). Anyway, so this ring thing suddenly decides it doesn't want to eat fish with gollum anymore and manages to get itself stolen by Bubble Baggins who's a hobbit. Now for the untolkienised, a Hobbit is a little fella who looks like a man, but is slightly shorter and stouter, something like what you'd get if you squeezed a man from the vertical ends to have him expand in the middle. Now Bubble doesn't wanna have anything to do with Sour One's wedding ring, so he presents it to Frodo, who then uses it to become the hero of the story.

Now this Frodo fella, he's quite a conceited one. He's not happy being the hero of just one book, so he somehow manages to get the HR to split the book into 3 parts for proper distribution of Valour, and then manages to squeeze out a package to make him the hero in all three, and then to top it all, he manages to get himself a fancy title, "The Ring Bearer, amidst other perks, which include an unlimited supply of Elven Bread courtesy Lembas Bread International and a brand new Mithril Suit from the Dwarven Alliance Ltd, not to mention a personal assistant cum secretary, Some Gum ji.

To be continued....

   [ POSTED BY d_tox_ed @ 10:12 PM ] [ 8 comments ]