The Americans, speak English.
The English, love English.
The French, hate English.
The Chinese, attempt English.
The Indians....ah the Indians. The Indians put English in a small glass test tube, stuff that in a glove. Put it under a truck's wheel. Run it over twenty times. Take out the glove and smash it with a power hammer. Put the rag in a blender. Add some water. Grind it to a fine paste. Put the paste in a freezer with a stick and take out an English popsicle. That's what Indian's do to English.

The other day I was driving down the highway when I came across a sign board which read "Pre Used Cars". Now my head goes...What the heck is a pre used car? In my daddy's age, cars were either new, or used. Pre used is like saying, you're gonna be using it eventually, so as long as we don't sell it, it's gonna stay pre used. And that's that. Logically, it could also mean, that the car ain't new, but it ain't used either. How about that?

Or how about the sign which said "Post Graduated College". Somebody please explain to me, who's doing what here? Is the college a graduate and helping others do the same? Or is everyone in the college a graduate and they posted the sign as a monument to their achievement?

But the one which takes the icing on the cake is the sign on a shop on Vijayaraghava road which says "Tyre Puncher". Now that's one shop I wanna stay away from. Especially since his shop seemed to have an especially beneficial symbiotic relationship with the shop directly opposite which flaunted a board proclaiming "Tier Repair". So if you ever have a flat tire after hitting a nail on the road and get out of the car wondering who the heck puts all these nails on the road, well, now you know where to look.

I say, we needn't even have fought the war of independence. Had we just spoken to the English in English, they would have left the country with their fingers in their ears and their heads shaking, long long back.

Now that's a lot of writing I've done here. So while you guys "are post here your nice nice comment", I'll go out and try and make up my mind about what to drink. There's a lot of options you know. Cool drink, cole drink, cold drink, kol drink, cold rink, kolrink, not to mention the varieties of thum sup, golds pot, and the eternal favourite of modest drinkers like me, child bear. Tally Ho Readers.

   [ POSTED BY d_tox_ed @ 4:45 PM ] [ 9 comments ]